Larry

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Larry
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Entertainment > Humor > Church Services in Future-----
 

Church Services in Future-----


PASTOR: Praise the Lord.

CONGREGATION: Hallelujah!
PASTOR: Can we please turn our tablet PC, iPad, cellphone, kindle Bibles to 1 Cor. 13:13. And please switch on your Bluetooth to download the sermon.
PASTOR: Let us pray, committing this week into God's hands. Open your Apps, BBM, Twitter and Facebook and chat with God.

PASTOR: Please have your credit and debit cards ready as we shall now take tithes and offerings. You can log on to the church Wi-If using the password Lord909887.

Ushers circulate mobile card swipe machines among the worshipers. Those who prefer to make electronic funds transfers are directed to computers and laptops at the rear of the church and those who prefer to use iPads are allowed to flip them open. Those who prefer telephone banking are allowed to take out their cellphones to transfer their contributions to the church bank account.

(The holy atmosphere is truly electric as the cellphones, iPads, PCs and laptops beep and flicker!)

[Announcement]
SECRETARY:
This week's ministry cell meetings shall be held on the various Facebook group pages where the usual group chatting takes place. Please don't miss out.
Thursday's bible teachings will be held live on Skype at 1900hrs GMT.
Please don't miss out. You can follow your Pastor on Twitter this weekend for counseling and prayers. God bless you and have a wonderful week !











posted on Jan 18, 2013 3:12 PM ()

Comments:

AMENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.
comment by kevinshere on Jan 20, 2013 11:16 PM ()
I wonder how many people sit in church even now and send text messages during the service.
comment by troutbend on Jan 19, 2013 9:03 PM ()
I don't think anyone does it in our church. We are mostly seniors and I can see all of them from where I sit.
I am down to 4% free space on this pc and nothing I do helps. I have had it since Christmas 2005 and this is this is the first time it has happened. If I can get the newsletter finished before it crashes I am going to take it to the shop
reply by larryb on Jan 20, 2013 1:17 PM ()
OMG Larry, do you suppose it will come to that?
comment by elderjane on Jan 19, 2013 5:26 AM ()
I sure hope not
reply by larryb on Jan 19, 2013 9:28 AM ()

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