Mark

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Mark
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Life & Events > Death Becomes Her or Him
 

Death Becomes Her or Him



Exciting news for the dying population is changing the funeral home industry. The Forever Siesta Funeral Home in Da Bronx, NY has welcomed a new CEO. Forever Siesta is expected to service more cadavers in less than a year than largest funeral chain now in North America, Dignity Funeral Homes.

The reason for Da Bronx explosion in the dying business other than the street gangs and drug warfare is the versatility of this new CEO, the eminent corpse humanitarian, Dee Seest. Dee interred and refined her profession at Smith and Wes Sons, another popular funeral parlor in Da South Bronx that never lacked for temporary residents. She is recognized for her extraordinary psychic para-abnormalities allowing her to communicate with the dear departed and relay messages to their kin from the great beyond. She has earned the highest awards given in the CNEA (Certified National Embalming Association). It is these special gifts she has that will drive business deep into the ground for Forever Siesta.

Dee Seest is also the president of the RSA ( Rigor Mortis Society) of America as well as the editor of Good Zombiekeeping with a plethora of renowned articles on decompositions and mummifications. Forever Siesta might just have "dying to get in" as their new catch phrase. Dee is competent that Forever Siesta will soon be the preferred designation in the United States for those folks who have gone to their eternal reward.

So, check into the Forever Siesta Funeral Home in Da Bronx or a soon to be location by you the next time you or your loved ones are looking for a place to die for. "One short sleep past, we wake eternally and death shall be no more."


posted on July 15, 2017 11:31 AM ()

Comments:

Nope, didn't change my mind. Still getting cremated.
comment by nittineedles on July 31, 2017 1:25 PM ()
I will by all means look up Ms. Dee Seets when I get ready to go. My
kin will still need messages from beyond in order to conduct their lives to my standards.
comment by elderjane on July 16, 2017 8:38 AM ()
Your advanced patronage is deeply appreciated. (about 6 feet)
reply by merchandiser50 on July 16, 2017 1:41 PM ()

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